


Various Ways to Annoy the Survey Corps

by HeichouPls



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Bad Puns, Fanfiction, Funny, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-16
Updated: 2014-08-15
Packaged: 2018-02-13 08:37:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2144148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeichouPls/pseuds/HeichouPls
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Want to know what makes the Survey Corps tick? Want to abuse that knowledge when you find out? Then I suggest that you read this, and find everybody's little boxes of fed up. Wait, what?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Jean

Chapter One : Jean

"Hey, you guys are already late again!" Jean yelled, pounding on the wooden door to the bathroom. Eren, Connie, Reiner, and Bertholdt, Jean's room buddies, were all held up in the bathroom, once again locking Jean out. "Why would you spend more time in the bathroom? Hey, guys come on! I need in there, too!" Faint laughing could be heard coming from the other side of the door, angering Jean, and causing him to pound harder on the door.

"Calm down, horse face! We didn't get caught yesterday!" Eren slammed an open palm on the door, laughing while the other boys, save for Bertholdt, who quietly brushed his teeth, joined in. 

"And, if we get caught today, wait..." Jean paused for a moment, thinking about what Eren had said, "what did you just say to me?" 

"Uh, calm down horse face we didn't get caught yest-"

"Horse face!?" Jean cut Eren off, raising his voice and stomping his left foot like an ignorant child. "What the hell is horse face supposed to mean?!"

"Well," Eren retorted quickly, "you kinda do have a face like a horse, hence the name Horse Face? It suits you well, if you ask me-"

"I'm SO going to KILL YOU!" Jean began to pound on the door, and fiddled with the doorknob. From the other side of the door, hysterical laughing could be heard, Connie having the loudest of laughs. All of a sudden, Jean fell backwards, flustered and holding the doorknob in his right hand. He blinked a couple of times as Eren slowly opened the door, not coming out but peering down to Jean.

"Uh, well...That was... Interesting." Eren slowly walked out with the others, smirking, but still somehow maintaining a serious look.

"It's all yours now, Horse Face."

 

( A/N : This one isn't very long, because I hadn't that many ideas for Jean. So creative, right? Anyways, I'm sorry that this one is so short, but the next chapter will be longer. Maybe. I'm knew to this site, so just be patient. Oh, and if you find this on Wattpad ( XWingsOfFreedomX) or Quotev (WingsofParadise - Username is in the URL ) don't freak out, it's me. )


	2. Petra

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so just a fair warning here... Petra is dead in this one, but she's an "angel." I don't know how many of you hate that stuff, oops.

Chapter Two : Petra

Petra had been dead now for months, but people still saw her.

Really, it was only her closest comrades, Eren Jeager, and Levi Ackerman. However, Hanji and Erwin could see her, too. Not that Erwin ever acknowledged it. He didn't believe in the supernatural, and Petra, being an angel, was no exception for him.

As for Eren, Levi, and Hanji, it was kind of like a nice nightmare. A dream that was good, but the same time, it was awful because it involved somebody you would never see again, yet, here Petra was. Except, with wings. And was she...glowing?! How odd...

"So, what you're telling me is..." Hanji stood with a blank expression, facing Petra. "Heaven is just all white and boring?" The two had been talking for some time, getting closer every time. Too bad she was dead, or her and Hanji would do almost everything together. 

Petra shrugged, shaking her head and smiling a bit. "At least you're not alone, you know. Everybody else is there, too."

"I don't know, that just doesn't seem like the heaven I used to always hear about from my parents. I remember everybody used to talk about how it is super peaceful, and you could have anything you wanted. You know, that kind of stuff." Hanji walked over to her desk, shuffling through mountains of paper, looking as if they would fall at any moment and leave a huge mess behind. For whatever reason, she had paper work everywhere, which wasn't too much like Hanji. She would at least have them in folders.

"Yeah, just another stereotype the Church feeds us." Petra shifted in her seat by the door, staring down Hanji's messy desk situation and thinking. "What would Heichou say if he saw that mess, Hanji?" As soon as Petra finished her sentence, her hand flew to her mouth.

"What do you mean?" Hanji slowly turned to face Petra, a small smirk upon her lips, "it isn't that bad, is it?" Hanji glared over to Petra, holding two oddly colored papers in her hands, One a kind of blue, one a dark, almost blood, red. Petra thought for a moment of what could possibly be on one of those papers, nothing super weird or scary, right? Petra shook her head, still being glared at by Hanji.

"Well, I mean..." Petra drew in a deep breath, and thought of the right words to say. "It looks like there are just random papers stacked on your desk. Are they even of relevance to each other? What ever happened to your neat, colorful little folders that you used to organize your paper work into?"

Hanji stood there for a moment, her smile gone and a now blank expression taking over her facial features. Lost in thought, Hanji dropped the colored papers she was holding onto the ground. One flew over to where Petra was sitting, but before Petra could get a clear view of what it was, it was snatched up off of the ground by Hanji, who appeared before Petra taller than before. Or maybe that was because Petra was sitting...

"You sound just like Levi." Hanji glared down to Petra, her expression slowly creeping up into a devious look. "What do you know anyways, Tree Huger? You've been gone for months, why would you care?"

Petra, appalled, jumped back in her seat. "Tree Huger?" Suddenly, Petra sprang up and stood up to Hanji. Hanji had definitely gotten taller, or Petra had gotten shorter. Petra only stood a bit below Hanji's chest, and Hanji, noting this, burst out in laughter.

"I didn't mean it I swear! That was a bit cruel of me, but you've got to admit, it was pretty funny!" Hanji fell onto the ground, the papers in her hand crumpling a bit. "You should have seen your face! I didn't know angels could become more pale than they already were!"

Petra stood there taken back. "Hanji, that wasn't even close to being funny. Why would you say something like that? Do you even know who killed me? I'm just happy I didn't feel much. But Tree Huger? You're such a jerk!"

Hanji still sat on her ass laughing while Petra pushed pass her and opened the door. Petra looked back at her to see if she would notice, but when she realized that she would only keep laughing, she grunted and walked out the door, slamming it shut.

The force and wind of the door slamming caused the papers to go berserk. There were different kinds of papers flying ever where, from reports, to notes, and even a few drawings. Hanji was laughing to much to realize this, until a paper flew by her, cutting her cheek. Her laughing ceased almost immediately as she dropped the papers she was holding, and looked around, her right hand going to the cut on her cheek.

"Oh damn," she muttered under her breath. "Petra didn't have to get that mad. It was only a joke." All of a sudden, a fist pounded on her office door. Maybe it's Petra coming to apologize and help me clean this up? She thought to herself, walking to the door. However, when she opened the door and looked down, it wasn't Petra standing there, it was Levi, and he looked pissed.

"What the hell is this all about?!" Levi glared daggers into Hanji's soul, causing her to step back. Suddenly she was nervous, and couldn't reply to Levi. With a deep breath in, she mentally prepared herself for the worst, and smiled nervously at Levi. She already knew how much shit she was in...

_____

( A/N : I would like you all to note that while being female in the anime, Hanji's gender is still undetermined and up to the reader in the manga. I would like her to be a little bit of both, myself, but I don't know how "acceptable" that proposition would be. Anyways, I think this is a good note to those of you who don't care what the anime says her gender is, and refer to Hanji as a guy. Be respectful of what other people label her as, as I know that most people refer to her as a girl thanks to the anime," therefore I have addressed her gender as female for this reason. Anyways, thank you for reading, and I hoped you liked it! )


End file.
